Infertility can cause tremendous emotional strain. Couples seeking support – either from family and friends or an infertility support group – should do whatever is possible to reduce stress levels during this trying time.
Emotional support can be essential in helping couples understand and validate each other’s emotions, improve communication between partners, and develop healthier coping mechanisms.
1. Don’t Blame Yourself
Making decisions around infertility can be emotionally distressing and challenging. People may experience feelings of sorrow, anger and guilt which is understandable – just keep in mind it’s not your fault that you are experiencing this challenge.
Most cases of infertility are caused by health conditions like polycystic ovary syndrome or endometriosis; other times it’s related to male factor infertility or unexplained infertility.
Women, men and couples all feel the emotional impact of infertility differently, which can often wreak havoc in relationships with friends and family. Speaking out can help couples find a healthier balance; joining support groups may also prove useful to reduce the burden associated with infertility on couples.
2. Don’t Feel Guilty
Infertility can make couples feel like they are alone in their struggle, as others around them post about pregnancies and gender reveals on social media. It can be heartbreaking watching friends and coworkers celebrate pregnancies with celebratory posts to social media.
When someone experiencing infertility shares their story with others, it can be easy for others to say hurtful and dismissive comments such as, “Why don’t you just adopt?” or, “It was only a blighted ovum; this happens all the time.”
Negative comments will only serve to increase stress for infertile couples already under strain, leading to feelings of guilt for being upset about their situation. Consulting a therapist may help couples navigate these emotions more successfully while developing more productive communication strategies.
3. Don’t Blame Your Partner
Making decisions together when trying to become pregnant can be challenging for couples. Pregnancy is a personal decision that needs the consideration and approval of both partners in the relationship.
Comments that make comments on their partner’s reaction to infertility can be deeply offensive and cause them to withdraw from conversations and treatments for infertility, adding additional emotional strain during treatment processes. Blaming can only add stress.
Don’t blame your partner for their negative emotions related to infertility; rather, understand that conception takes two and there could be many reasons for your inability to conceive. Your partner is not at fault; point the finger only adds more frustration and distress. A marriage and family therapist can assist in communication improvements as well as stress relief while discussing treatment options available.
4. Don’t Say “It’s Not Your Fault”
Making an attempt at conception and then experiencing pregnancy loss or miscarriage can be devastating to anyone, and can cause immense emotional strain that leads to anxiety, depression, relationship difficulties and self-stigmatization. Blaming couples for their fertility struggles only compounded their distress further.
It is also essential to discuss how fertility journey affects couples’ relationships. Many couples struggle with maintaining intimacy while going through treatments like hormone injections and scheduling love making sessions regularly, with couples therapy serving as one way to work through these emotions and strengthen communication and connection as a couple.
Psychodynamic psychotherapy, which explores past traumas and unconscious processes, may also be useful in helping people better deal with infertility and related challenges. Speak to your reproductive endocrinologist about this option.
5. Don’t Say “Maybe It’s Not Meant to Be”
Fertility treatments can be an emotional roller coaster for couples. It may cause disappointment, anger, guilt and shame that can have lasting ramifications on a relationship and marriage.
Support groups and counsellors that specialize in infertility can be an invaluable source of comfort. Family and friends may offer additional help as well, although it’s essential that they understand exactly what kind of help is required – nobody can read your mind! No one will assume what support will work best; so be sure to communicate what type of assistance you require from each of these sources.
Psychodynamic psychotherapy is a form of therapy which investigates any unconscious processes from one’s past that might be contributing to current psychological problems such as infertility. Psychodynamic therapy may help couples navigate emotional struggles more efficiently while creating healthier coping mechanisms.
6. Don’t Say “It’s Time to Move On”
Experiences during an infertility treatment journey can be emotionally tiring. Repeated cycles of hope and despair may lead to depression and anxiety; further complicating matters further by commentaries such as, “maybe it wasn’t meant to be”. Pessimism or other statements such as, “maybe it just isn’t meant to happen”, can cause additional strain for couples undergoing fertility treatments.
Recognizing the psychological ramifications of infertility is crucial, both for women and men. Marriage and family therapists can help couples navigate this difficult process more successfully and develop effective coping mechanisms that support emotional well-being – whether the solution lies with conception, adoption or simply choosing childlessness – counseling provides essential support.
7. Don’t Say “It’s Time to Move On”
An infertility journey can place an immense amount of emotional strain on individuals and couples alike. Seeking support from a trained infertility therapist provides a safe space to discuss these complex feelings in a safe manner.
Therapy can assist couples in understanding each other’s emotions and developing more effective communication channels between themselves, leading to less tension, stress, and anxiety as well as providing more efficient fertility treatments.
Infertility can be an emotionally and physically draining experience that changes every aspect of a person or couple’s lives, from relationships and career goals to physical health and relationships with family and friends. Though difficult, infertility will eventually resolve itself–whether by getting pregnant naturally, adopting or choosing childfree living. Remembering who you are outside your fertility status may help.
